Start of the Series Original Opening Regards:
One, chapters may be named the same thing with multiple perspectives. I’m not really going for a word count and if something goes on for too long I may separate it into part one or part two or more. If I don’t like the formatting, I’ll change it (And back date it) but for now, this is the way it is and will be.
Two, the way I’m writing this is (in essence) the way I think webnovels are supposed to be written? I.e. one chapter at a time. So, instead of writing out the whole story and then doing edits, I’ll edit as I go, try to keep plot points in line and plot holes out. I wanted to try this medium of story telling even if I have no idea how good it will be.
This series, as projected by me will be 6 books, or what I will call “books,” long. (It ended up being seven.) I’m not sure how many words or chapters that is, but the story will end when I decide it will end. Unlike webnovels that I read online, this will not be a moment to moment story (most of the time) but rather snapshots of the days and specific moments as we move through the story. A glimpse into the lives, if you will.
With that said. Let us begin.
Notes on Inspiration:
Most of this comes from a dream I had when I was younger. I really don’t know what inspired that dream, but I do remember my notes and details that I wrote in my dream note book about the dream. Most of the names changed other than The Project name, Igilistal, and the trio (Zeydar, Heia, Evester). The plotting of the original dream is completely different than what ended up happening. IDK. The actual story here is much better than that dream, I think.
In that dream there were initially supposed to be four books. When I was initially planning out this series, and the notes for it, I created an approximate timeline based on the dream with some dates (that later made their way into the book). The first followed only Heiphillia, the second Zeydar and the third the Igilistal family. The fourth would have brought them together. This is as shown here:
– 98 Days Until Chaos and The Uncertain End*
– 65 Days Until Brutality and The Uncertain End
– 32 Days Until Bitterness of The Uncertain End
– The Uncertain End and The Days That Passed
– 275 Days Until Chaos and the Uncertain End
– 195 Days Until Brutality and The Uncertain End
– 98 Days Until Bitterness of The Uncertain End
– 46 Days Until Freedom of The Uncertain End
– 7 Days that Breached The Uncertain End
– Welcoming The Uncertain End
– 1 Days Until The Uncertain End
– The Plight of Yasloughve
– Why Life Mattered
– Under the Guidance of a Fascinating Never
As you can see here, there are a lot of names for titles that I ended up using. In fact, some of them I ended up making the book titles: Finally and Under the Guidance of a Fascinating Never. I ended up going ahead with the alternating POVs as I realized that this novel was going to be a lot more. Additionally, you are going to notice here that the books were not sequential, they happened almost at the same time but a bit staggered.
* In my initial dream, the end of times is called the Day of Doom. Everyone BUT Evester calls it this. He calls it The Uncertain End. When creating my initial chapter list and write up, I liked that a lot better. The fact that Evester called it the Uncertain End, was rather important to me, and later filtered on to other details. You can learn more about all the titles here.
Things I Learned:
03/27/2020 – I was beginning my set up for book 4, because I’m about a book ahead of the current posting schedule, when I realized I messed up. Lol in order for this not to end in a mess, I have to add an entire book, which moves this from 6 proposed books to 7. I am livid with myself for being so silly to assume I could go from 100 – 90 – 70 days without having an issue, even though book 1 only took place over approximately 40 days. Not to mention that from B1-B2, we covered 75 days in 97 chapters. This means about 1.3 chapters per day. And I wanted do 30 days in 3 chapters? Lol three chapters to cover the amount of content that B1 covered? I couldn’t do that, so I had to add approximately 2 books worth of proposed chapters (because I already labeled all my chapters in a way, figuring out which days to touch). I only added one more book, however. This means that the new book 4, instead of been about 40-50 chapters like B1-B3, or B5-B7, it’s a massive 100+.
01/09/2021 – Honestly, this has been a lot harder than I had anticipated. Unlike writing a normal novel for me, this is much harder, because I’m posting as I’m going and thus instead of just finishing it in one shot, I’m taking time. As such it is really killing my flow. When I finish a book it is done in a few weeks (two or three) and then I just don’t do ANYTHING for months, before I realize I need to get the next book done so I have content to fall back on once my current content disappears. My goodness. In some ways this is keeping me from actually writing this consistently, and it it is harder. It is fascinating tho, and making me think in a different way than I have before. Its a very different writing skill, for sure.
01/16/2021 – I’ve gone ahead and added the final book names. I am nowhere done with them, but I figured put them up because I already know the names of them.
09/23/2021 – Wow. I took a sharp break and completely lost all my momentum. It was not my goal. As it is rn this will not end until 2023. Am Im particularly angry about that? No. However it was not my intention for this to take so long. Eitherway. It has been a fun and interesting exploration on writing long form stories for me. I am usually used to writing an entire plot out start to finish. This makes me revist and adapt and I think I’ve gotten to know the characters in a different way. I appreciate it.
Update 12/2021 – It is important to note that for this update. I messed up the math, lol. And when I say messed up, I gave myself an additional year. When adding the chapters to my list, I realized I was really off. I fixed it for the following updates.
Update 04/2022 – I decided for this update that I wanted to create some extra posts. I realized here that I needed to do a final reread in order to collect all the terms and names. By doing so, I realized a few inconsistencies, that I will need to address.
Update 07/2022 – Finally I got through the whole of the reread. This means that I just need to make all the posts and edit them. Edits for the final books are completed as well, which just leaves the final posting schedule.
Update 09/2022 – I am so excited for the ending of the series. I still have to figure out the count down, but my heart is racing with the idea of this finally being done.
Zeydar: Both the easiest and the hardest character for me, I still don’t think I did as well as I probably could have with more time. Zeydar’s drug addiction I wrote based on part research, part experience of those I knew who were high functioning drug addicts. With the sort of drug I created with Dreams, there is no 1 to 1 exact way to relate his experience, added on top of that his magical capabilities. I did my best to balance the two but found myself struggling with him the most. Even now I do not regret making the choice, but I do know that there is so much work I could or can do to edit and fix the depiction.
Evester: What’s really striking to me about Evester was how much he changed as a character throughout this piece. I can not say, with confidence, that the person he was to begin with was or is the same person he ends as. In a rewrite, with what I know now, I would certainly stabilize this a lot more. I would also make him a bit more selfish. Right now he falls into the catch all character who is simultaneous developing and stagnant at the same time. He is such an interesting character because he doesn’t actually do anything, he doesn’t have to grow, and he does what is needed of him when it is needed. AKA he’s not really a real person, and as such his character really needs a full overhaul. The Evester at the end of the book is more of the Evester I would have like to play around with more. His addiction to adrenaline, power, control, etc. are probably what needed to be addressed. But I didn’t know Evester’s whole backstory when I started writing. I didn’t know the Igilistals. I didn’t know about EverDanger. As these things came up, he changed. I really think that his whole arc in book 4 is super freaking stagnant. He does literally nothing. All the others are doing more, and tbh it bores me. He’s the most boring of the characters, which is hilarious because this character and his known story (father disappears, he’s connected to the apocalypse) was what drew me to write this to begin with. Of the main three, he’s the weak link. It’s sad in a lot of ways, and I wish so much more for him. Also, tbh his character ends and starts with Zeydar at some of this book, which I would really like to change too. Too late now.
Heia; I actually love Heia. I realize that a lot of people might hate her because she whines a lot and she doesn’t know everything. That’s on me. That’s not on her. TBH I wish I made her more of a hard ass. Someone needs to stand up to the preestablished system. That was Heia and her family. Ultimately, the issue is, however, that I lost sight of Heia. I think that her chapters still have her essence, but as the other parts of the Igilistals and the Circle/Star politics were developed, I lost sight of what I needed Heia to do. I tried my best, but I could have done more with her destroying the establishment. I need her to do more to destroy the establishment. My single most favorite chapter to write in this whole thing was the chapter where Heia is leading the protest. I needed more of that. But in books 6 and 7 it fell flat. I wish I had done more.
Balancing the three POVs: One of the things I noticed, through writing this, was that they are unequal. Zeydar gets, objectively, the best story out of them all. This is because I knew his story the best. AND because he was able to establish himself without the others. Heia and Evester meet immediately, and so I had to figure them out as they figured each other out. For Zeydar, I was able to write him on his own, for a whole full book. This allowed a lot of possibility to bloom within him. Because I knew the stars, and his issues, before the others arrived, I knew exactly how his arc would feed into the others as they moved forward. Heia and Evester were not as lucky. By the time I knew who Heia and Evester were as actual people, and the politics of the Xs and Circles, that they were versed in, I already had Zeydar. I couldn’t go back in time to fix it. As such, Heia’s arc feels contrived and flat. She should do so much more, but she’s spinning in circles trying to catch up. Meanwhile Evester is a white sheet of paper that gets dyed the colors of everyone else until I know who he is later. This is mean to the characters, I know. But I also know that if I rewrote it now, knowing what I know? Things would be so different.
OG EverDanger: I do wish I gave more time to Lynx and Onyx. I think that out of everyone Lynx and Onyx get the least development, which is saying something because I think that Uly and Kim are the only two who get a lot of development. Although I did realize I never made it explicitly clear that Kim’s family moved with Maverin to Ovaria from Valaria for the project. Like, they were connected to it. Whoops.
Phil gets character establishment, like you know exactly the kind of person he is. But do you know his wants? Hopes? Dreams? Yeah me neither. Crass and Rayda get a bit of that and I think Lynx and Onyx get the least. Crass and Rayda could have gotten more I think, but I think it is okay as it is, in some ways. In a rewrite, I would establish every single one of them better. They would also get far more time to be developed. I think all these rich kids need to become actual heroes not celebrities, and that change never really happened organically. IMO.
Heia’s Family: On the opposite side, however, I have Heia’s family. I think that all of Heia’s family are well established. I do think that Robee and Trace are the weak links and that is partially because they are with Heia in book 4 when they should go with Evester, because we can develop both of them better with someone who doesn’t know them, than being with Heia who does. She doesn’t need to know more about her siblings. If I fixed book four, I would push Rayda to Heia and Robee and Trace with Evester. This flip would force me to develop Rayda, Lynx, and Onyx more. Likewise, Robee and Trace would be developed more. Crass and Karla are linked and Karla develops well with Evester, and thus Crass does too as he learns to have a new family. Layla and Andre are also weak links, but we know a bit more about their wants and needs than say Lynx and Onyx. I think I should have had more time with them at home in Zeydar’s sections of book 4 in order to develop them more.
Kori, Karla, and Kony however? God. I could do so much more with them, but out of all the side characters (including Uly, Kim, and the Igilistals) they get the best development. They actually change. Kony changes from Kori’s side kick to a young man capable of fighting the system. Yes he clings to Zeydar a lot, but I really think that’s more idolization than his dependency on Kori to begin with. Kori actually becomes a beacon and a hero where the others are like sorta heroes, Kori is out here saving lives. She went from being a copycat-daredevil (I actually now really want her to be an EverDanger fanatic who wanted to be just like them) to understanding consequences probably better than anyone else. And then there is Karla. Karla who is like a ghost in the early books, existing because she exists. Then she stays with Evester, and becomes a brilliant actress and fighter, with her own sass and character. I can not explain to you how much she blossomed for me, and how much more I wish I could do with her in the beginning now, and ending.
There is so much potential for all siblings, and if I redid it, they would all shine so much brighter.
Igilistal Family: Out of all the side characters, I think that the Igilistals are the best developed. This is strange, because they’re in book 2, 4-7. Whereas EverDanger is in 2-7 and Heia’s family is in them all. I think the reason they’re better developed, is because their development is so tied to the way that Circle society functions. In order to understand Circles, you have to understand their family. You see the pressure on them, and what they want to do. I think Endwin could probably use the most work out of the rest of the family, but Maverin? Estashia? Europa? We see what they want, their pressures, and what kind of people they are. There is probably more I could do for Europa, but Estashia and Maverin are actually pretty solid. This could be because they are essentially tertiary characters, but I think it has more to do with the development of the Circles.
Shawn and May: I would have liked to do a lot more with both of them. They are, however, tied to the characters they are around. Shawn with Heia and later Zeydar. May with Zeydar and later May. I think I could have done more with both of them to explain their wants better, but as secondary characters they’re not terrible and May has a character arc! Also I love them and their relationship and I would love to do so much more with it.
Stars: I think that the Stars as an organization were well organized and explained, tho I could have done a lot more if I wanted to, now that I know the end. I also think that Tyler and Majorie were well developed, especially since Tyler was only in flashbacks. Majorie’s struggle probably could have been foreshadowed a lot more. Anthony, however, really does come across as a standard stereotypical villain. He’s not supposed to be. He’s supposed to be making the best decision for the Stars, as has been instilled upon them through generations. He’s supposed to be a person who has been hurt by the system himself, who ends up hurting others. It’s a whole cycle of abuse. This did not come across in this way. It seems like he’s more of a person who needs to stay in power (which is valid) but I could have done this better. There aren’t any other stars of note, so… that’s it.
Other Characters: There are other Circles and Xs who are named (Graceon and Alan Penn) and I think they are pretty well done for tertiary characters. I probably could have done a bit better to make them less mechanical, but hey… It’s disjointed writing at best, I can’t beat myself up for these two characters who really are only there for some extra conflict. Alan Penn could have been far scarier in terms of reality, but for what he is, it’s not terrible.
Aralax: I talk about their inconsistencies later, but I do wish I had a better idea about them other than strange large bug monster to begin with. I actually like them a lot, and I wish I had developed their attack patterns and strategies other than just using them as a device at the beginning. Because that’s what they are, a scary device. But they could have been so much more.
The Apocalypse: So, this was a lot of fun. Playing with a story that has an apocalypse from all these different sides was a lot of fun. Especially when you don’t know what it is. What is causing it? Can it be stopped? Is it people? Is it the Aralax? Is the planet just dying? It’s all of them, toppled on each other. This was a lot of fun to navigate.
The Yasloughve Project: Ah I love this MacGuffin so much. Like so, so much. When you have tools that really could not exist, but they do exist and thus they become tools to use in the plot, it’s always fun to use them. I do call this a Macguffin, (although Zeydar is arguably one too), because has the project ever been wrong? No. People could be wrong, but the project? No. Also the project can do EVERYTHING. It does what I need it to do when it needs to be done. And look, I usually like having better explanations, but did I ever give you one for this? No. Hopefully you just bought in to the idea that some computer program could actually predict the future.
Society (Stars, Circles, and X): I had a lot of fun playing with this. I don’t think it was executed as well as it could have been with the social destruction that the Circles and Stars created on the Xs, but I love its origin. I knew I wanted a society where the high elites were originally supposed to be the soldiers to save the world but instead they just thought they were elite humans and were greedy and didn’t care about the general public (wow sounds a lot like rich people in general). I should have more to dissect this tho, and destroy the circle’s and star’s cultures. Instead I kinda reward them and that’s not cool at all. But also, I didn’t have a full idea of the cultures when I began and why they were in existence the way that they were at the inception. That’s on me. I should have had a better idea.
Cities: I LOVE the idea of Towers and UnderCities. I wish I described them so much more. Oh how I wish I did. I have these lush images in my head of predestruction and post destruction, that I just never gave as elaborations. (Mostly because IDK where I would add them in the current story as it stands. There aren’t exactly moments to breathe in this). But I like the idea of massive sky towers and their cities in the clouds as well as underground cities that are expansive and elaborate. Just know that before the catastrophe they were all beautiful, just the Circle CloudCities were more beautiful than the others, because of the money.
Magic: Favorite part, as usual. Unlike my usual, I went into this system relatively blind for how it works. Thats in part why you get a full description of how it actually works later on when Kony learns and when Zeydar learns again. I learn more as I was writing, but I really like magic systems that require a lot of work to use. I’m a science based magic kinda person, so I would do so much more now if I could. But I won’t.
Holoblades: I’m not sure anyone else noticed this. BUT. I was talking for the colors and it was all a mess in the opening chapters. Stars should have white, Circles Blue, and X’s Orange. It’s a link to magic. However, I never really specified color after the beginning. So oops. Also, I kept forgetting so, the colors kept changing in the early chapters. It was supposed to be a big deal because Kori, Karla, and Kony are supposed to have different color blades (Karla is supposed to be a Circle, IDK if this is explicitly said. It also could have been retconned or never brought up later when they were all tested). For a bit only Kony had a different color. This is a mistake but I’m too lazy to go back and fix it.
Spelling Majorie: For a lot of the books, I call her Majorie with no “r.” It is so strange that like the first book is completely without the “r” and then later it’s mostly with the “r.” I actually think that my switch to the different spelling was because of how I wrote it, her name just changed. It should be Majorie with no r, so I went to fix it. If you see any with the r, point it out and let me know.
Spelling Heiphillia: If you see her name with one “l” that’s wrong. Tell me, I need to fix it. At some point I just did this wrong, also because of a writing problem. I tried to fix this, but I might have missed a few.
Shawn’s siblings: They should both be girls. I might have messed that up. Also IDK what I did with his family. They disappeared. BYE.
EverDanger: Here’s something that should be no surprise to anyone. EverDanger, as a concept, was not developed or considered, until I had already started. I needed Evester to reveal himself to the world, and in that I was like… oooh what about his friends. And thus started a major inconsistency, which was that Heia and her family would have recognized him a lot earlier, because he wasn’t particularly well disguised. They didn’t know he was Evester from EverDanger, because EverDanger didn’t exist. The idea was that he was some rich Circle boy that was missing and they kinda knew his face from the news, but that was it. This is what usually happens when people are looking for others IRL, and so I wanted to use the typical face ignorance that people have when confronted with someone who is important but they don’t know why (i.e. they’ve seen them once on the news but they can’t remember much else). Heia and her family didn’t know him, because he was a Circle and they weren’t much supposed to care that he was missing. With EverDanger, however, he is now a celebrity, and them not clocking him immediately is a major issue.
Heia and Shaw Fake Lovers: this was a plot at one point as a rumor that people were speculating. It was brought up once and never again. I actually just forgot it was even said.
Heia’s poetic name origin: I wanted to bring this up again, but I found it difficult to do so. I think that if I rewrote it. I’d keep this in mind a lot more.
Aralax: Did you know they could fly? I FORGOT. Their attack patterns have no consistency. If they can’t see the light, why did they attack the sky Towers first? Why didn’t they attack the underground? Why wasn’t that the first place???? Their acidic blood vs not being acidic. It burns people but later on I’m like, JK it’s just corrosive AF. Honestly there are so many inconsistencies with them because it wasn’t until they end battles when Zeydar was figuring them out and decimating them that I was like. Oh! That’s how they work. I really should fix them, but that would take a lot of major rewrites.
Star and Circle Corruption: I think I could have done way more with this than I did, and made them suffer for it more. As it is, it kind of gets swept under the rug because there are more pressing survival matters. In a rewrite, I would not let this fall to the way-side. In part this is my fault for forgetting and, in another, my fault for not making the punishment strict enough.
Igilistal dating rules: LOL I really hope no one takes this as an end all be all, romantic thing. Cuz its not. The sheer dedication these people have is borderline obsessive. Lol Maverin is pretty objectively terrible and people shouldn’t be with people they love, if those people hurt them. However, I made the choice for the family because it felt right for the family. If someone was going to have some sort of fucked up tradition like it, it would be the family. This is especially true considering how they treat life, secrets, power, and control. The novel is about breaking established practices, and while this one is not broken — I hope its implied that it should be, and probably will be. As well as how easy it is to be lulled into power and the security that it gives.
Shawn and May: I actually wish I gave this side couple a bit more time. Not a lot more (I really do like the fact that it’s a shock to everyone) but at least some more banter to make the tension obvious.
Heia and Kim: This was actually one of the relationships I wish I could go back and develop better. Originally the idea was for Heia, Evester, and Zeydar to have a triad OR they were all going to be totally platonic. But the more I developed it, I realized that EvesterxZeydar was going to be pretty exclusive. This was when I went to Kim for Heia, as Kim was Heia’s favorite and Heia had always watched her the most carefully. I really wish I could have seeded this far more. With Zeydar and Evester this was ever present since B1, but for Kim and Heia it was not and I wish it was. This would also require some rewrites for the opening of Heia not recognizing Evester. Can you imagine the tension and longing that Heia would and could have had for Kim if I had done it earlier than book 3? Book 1? Book 2? SO MUCH. God. Heia pinning for a woman who was a completely different world from her and one whom she assumed was in love with Evester? Oh the angst… I WISH. Unfortunately I did not come up with it until Book 3. In a big rewrite this would be changed now, to be the plan from the beginning. Because ugh, it’s so GOOD. I need so much more of this romance and pining and everythinggggg. And then I could have added a few more scenes namely the following:
- Just like Zeydar, Heia would have had memories of a girl visiting with Mr. Listal who was her training buddy and probably first kiss (Kim. Because Kim and Uly were trained with the Igilistal’s). This would be before the assumption start of what we as the audience know as EverDanger. Aka before Kim started dying her hair blood/fire red. Like preteens, awkward and without much of the full look of what they’d grow into.
- Kim and Heia seeing each other and Kim recognizing Heia but Heia not recognizing Kim outside of EverDanger because Kim has changed so much. The ache and pain from Kim being like: I really like this girl, but I’m trained to be an Igilistal and do what is needed AND she doesn’t recognize me AND she has a boy already. It’s fine. I’m fine. And she’s actually not fine and just falling over herself in front of Heia trying to act cool and chill.
- Kim later finds out that Shawn and Heia are not, in fact, a thing and Kim is like FUCK IT. And she just starts flirting and FAILING because Heia is like, this Circle wouldn’t flirt with me/doesn’t understand me. (AHHHH The VIBES)
- And over here Heia is falling head over heals too quick and then the ANGST of being like, noooo she’s not good for me. (I NEED IT)
- Later Kim flirting and Heia being like. Nooo she doesn’t like me. She likes Evester and Kim just being on her knees like. I love you please. And Heia is like: your love is just as a friend. I know. Because at this point she doesn’t realize how obvious Kim is being (while the rest of EverDanger is like, so you’re getting married when?). Heia just thinks she’s being nice.
- And then we get the car scene and Kim is like. GIRL I DON’T LIKE HIM. And Heia is like (light bulb) wait. She doesn’t like Evester? THEN WHO? WHOOO? I’M JEALOUS. and she’s actually just jealous of herself, and Kim just thinks she’s adorable misunderstanding. And everyone is like, is Heia okay? Do we need to explain this to her, and Shawn is like. Nah this is hilarious, I want to see her panic more.
All this before/by the end of Book 3? YAS.
And then they finally get together and it’s like FINALLY! WE HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS.
Lol look, Heia is not an idiot. However, I think that her with her class conciseness and the fact that the Circles and Xs are so estranged would result in some very interesting dynamics. Because unlike Zeydar and Evester who are both pariah’s in their classes, Heia and Kim exemplify them and their biases. Kim would need to unlearn a whole lot. Which is to say Kim does, a bit, but I wish I could do this a lot more now.
In general, I found this a really fun exercise on trying to write every day for a consistent. I did fail at the challenge and was really pressed to actually complete this in a timely manner. The continuous posting and the hold ups were a mess on my mental patience, but I think I grew a lot in this project, specifically in regards to developing things in my initial drafts. While there are a lot of things I would do differently now, if I redid it, I do think that ultimately I grew as a writer.
I had a lot of writers blocks on this, not in the sense that I couldn’t write or I didn’t know where to go, but the deadline was so far away for when I needed to have it done by that I just stopped working (which then meant I missed the deadline and had to take hiatuses). It is an interesting feeling not wanting to write, even when you know you can, because you don’t have to. Usually that’s not like me, and so I was kinda surprised by it. In future projects I can use this and learn from it, I think, by working on other aspects of the narrative and doing those instead when I don’t feel the pressure to complete something.
I fell in love with these characters and with this magic system and this world. I really do hope that they don’t destroy their new home. I also think that this pushed me to really be open with my writing being on the internet. While I do know that this is essentially the equivalent of a first draft (or second, or like a revised first draft) it is a completed story that I have shared with the public and that’s a sort of milestone. Even if no one reads it.
I can’t wait to transfer the skills that I have gained from working on pacing and multiple POVs to other works, in order to ensure the same sort of bored feeling I got at points here, does not happen in other works. This was a worthwhile experience, and here is to Concinnity having just as many lessons learned, and pushing through blocks. I will miss the Yasloughve Project. I will miss these characters, but ultimately I might revisit them in the future who knows. For now, this is the end.
“Ever Present. Ever Surviving. Ever Dangerous.”[B4.68(215)]
Until Next Time,