94 Days Until Spring And the Uncertain End
Zeydar stood before Shawn looking over the solider before him and then back to his class. Shawn gave the class a one over before he started speaking about things that Zeydar wasn’t sure that they cared about. However, it was important history. In truth, Zeydar was still trying to figure out all the details about what had happened to their companions. There was little information about it and it had gotten everyone into a tizzy. If it weren’t for the constant communication with Uly, they would have feared for the worst.
He was behind on the news because of classes and the Superiors, but finding out that Heia had started a global protest and Evester was attacked nightly, had nearly sent Zeydar spiraling over the edge. He had not realized that he cared so much until he was begging Europa for more information and Endwin gave him a look. Zeydar had slept in Evester’s room the night before. It felt like an invasion of privacy, but it was also, perhaps, the best sleep that Zeydar had gotten since he had gotten to Ovaria. When he had left for work that morning, Kony in tow, Endwin had handed Zeydar a book.
Zeydar had been able to proposition more freedom out of the Superiors to stay where he wanted. They demanded more of him and Kony as a result, but staying in Estashia’s mansion felt better. Zeydar had no doubts she was pressuring them from another angle, and he did not pry. Zeydar had not opened the brown leather book with the gold Igilistal family crest on it. He had an idea of what it was and he did not want to look. He did not want to explore what was dangerous to explore. Not yet. Not until he was certain.
“And what does this have to do with magic?” The question was asked in the middle of Shawn’s explanation. Zeydar eyed the student trying to figure out a quip in retort. Zeydar was told he had to cut down on his complaints in order to continue staying at Estashia’s, and thus Zeydar needed to tread carefully.
“Because I don’t have magic.” Shawn answered instead. “And in order to understand the importance of your gift, you have to understand the majority. Those who do not have it are those you are to use magic for.”
Zeydar nodded before adding, “We only found magic because of the magicless. To understand our own magic, it’s important to understand how those who don’t have it interact with the world.”
“But we will never live their lives.” The student protested.
“Exactly.” Zeydar eyed them. He did not want to scare them with the fact that their next world might strip their magic from them completely. Then what would that feel like? To know they had nothing? It scared Zeydar who felt the particles in the air tickling his skin. What would it be like for them? “And those of you with fire will never understand those with ice. Those in defense specialties will not understand those in offensive specialties. But we still have to try.”
There was an odd silence as the time came to an end and Zeydar was forced to dismiss the class. He hoped none of them complained. What he said was viable and necessary. The more he thought about it, however, the more that Zeydar realized that he was only worried because it meant he wouldn’t be near Evester’s room. The gold insignia caught his eye again. Was Zeydar ready to face that possibility? Was he ready to face the fact that he might turn out like Tyler and Marjorie?
“They hate me.” Shawn stated as soon as they were gone.
“No. They hate me. They don’t care about you.” Zeydar pushed the book aside, and with it the thoughts of Evester.
“And that’s how they could care less about us when they become military Mages.”
Zeydar knew Shawn was referencing the massacres they’d happened upon. Zeydar knew that he meant the facilities where they were being tested on. He knew that there was so many evils that the Stars had orchestrated, and how it was almost folly for Zeydar to try to change them now. But he wanted to, he needed to. He couldn’t let them exist in the way that they had for as long as they had. “Yes, that is how they become Military Mages.”
Shawn sighed to himself. Zeydar saw the same pensive look on Shawn that Zeydar felt himself.
“Are you thinking of May?” Zeydar asked him.
“Are you thinking of May?” Shawn glanced back. They both knew that May had many biases that she was working through. Zedyar’s constant challenging of her notions of magic and the Superiors had her on edge. She was with Shawn and Zeyday knew he challenged her constantly.
“She’s not bad, not horrible either, but she did believe the Superiors.” Yet she had slept with Shawn, which should have been enough to say that she didn’t see X’s the same way. Even Zeydar couldn’t vouch for it. “When you are trained in one way for so long, you do believe it. It takes active work to stop believing it.”
“Active work that X’s are humans.”
“You’ve heard of Tax Season.” Zeydar shot Shawn a look.
“Please do not remind me.” Shawn shook his head and sat down reading more on Superior culture and laws. Zeydar’s eyes drifted to his book. He had another class to prepare for. Yet… He didn’t know anything about the Igilistals, but what the public knew. If he knew more would it force him to decide? Would it let him know what was at stake? Would it open his perspective? If he knew would it change anything at all?
In silence Zeydar opened the book and began to read the words driving them home into his memory. He was never to tell anyone of the contents of the book. He could do that. He had enough secrets as it was. The two continued reading as they waited for the next class.